Should I Lie In My Online Dating Profile?
Oct 26, Pioneer Press columnist Jackie Pilossoph says people who lie about their ages in online dating are people to be avoided. According to online dating deception statistics, 81% of singles lie about their height, Let's say you subtract 9 years off your age and right after the cups of coffee. Feb 14, Word of warning this Valentine's Day: Many online daters love to stretch the truth. of men and one-fifth of women say they lied about their age.
Remember feeling fully alive, the energy running through your fingertips, your lips, or other places in your body. How good that felt. Put yourself in the picture so that you are looking through your own eyes. Imagine yourself feeling better, even better. Imagine yourself feeling five times better. Now take that image and bring it closer to you.
Make it brighter, clearer. Give it a great soundtrack, magnify all those good feelings—make them stronger. I call this self-loving part of your identity the Body Love Diamond Self. Have fun and give yourself permission to be outrageous with this!
Say this name to yourself. The Disappointing Self Exercise Shrink the image of your alive sensual self and make it as small as a real diamond.
Then put that image aside. Now do Recall an image of yourself at a time when you felt fat, ugly, invisible, or unattractive, ashamed about your body, asexual or unlovable. When you made up lots of body image war stories. When you feel you should lie about your age.
This is your Disappointing Body Self image. Take your Body Love image, make it the size of a hand grenade, and imagine throwing it right into the center of your Disappointing Body Image, watching it explode and completely destroy the Disappointing image.
Should You Lie About Your Age in Your Online Dating Profile?
Speed the whole thing up and do it several more times. Do this until you cannot get a clear image of the Disappointing Body Self Image. Write Down your Body Love Name on several sheets of paper and put one near your computer, one in your closet, and one near the bathroom mirror. Glance at your new name often during the day.
You can do a quick version of the whole ultimate Body Love Diamond Self exercise whenever you are interacting with a guy whether online or notheading on a date or need to be comfortable in your own skin and at ease with your body, your age and your appearance. Just like snowflakes, there are no two self-loving names that are alike. Yours is completely unique and will make your appearance look different to you and to others.
Believe it or not, your new nickname will also change your body and your health and help you look younger! Self-attacking thoughts cause stress and chronic tightness in your back and other muscle systems, collapse your posture, and physically change your blood cortisol levels which measure anxiety, to name just one factor so that you age more rapidly.
They hurt your health.
Should I Lie In My Online Dating Profile?
You can see it better when we overlay the implied best fit below pardon the technical language: Almost universally guys like to add a couple inches. You can also see a more subtle vanity at work: This means that guys as they get closer to six feet round up a bit more than usual, stretching for that coveted psychological benchmark.
But be realistic — if you're 6 inches shy of that benchmark, just add an inch. However, if you add 2 or more inches, proceed at your own risk.
Similarly, men might err on the side of thinness when it comes to describing their body type. But again, be realistic — and remember how it feels to go out on a date with someone who obviously misrepresented themselves. Don't be that guy. That guy goes home alone every time. Location Where you live is another entry on the Acceptable Fib list.
Dating sites ask for your zip code so they can find matches that are nearby. Your answer is confidential, although your city will be displayed on your profile. But your zip code can become a problem if you live on the outskirts of a large metro area.
Why You Should Stop Lying About Your Age on Dating Sites - The Good Men Project
For instance if you live in Manhattan, you may not want to consider dating anyone who lives across the bridge in Brooklyn for logistical regions.
The bigger the city, the more this matters. When she checks out your profile after you message her, living 20 miles away from that city girl could very well blow your chances.
Women, especially attractive ones, already have messages from an abundance of interesting local options crowding their inbox. So if you're up for the commute, think about using a zip code a bit closer to the city center. Speaking of commutes, if you happen to work in the city but live in the suburbs, consider using your work zip code when you set up your dating profile. You probably spend more of your waking hours at work anyway, so the discrepancy is much easier to explain later than it would be if you just randomly picked a more central zip code.
But depending on what your salary is, bending the truth here could be setting you up for problems down the line — especially when it comes to dating expectations.